brainstatic:

I don’t care what the Founding Fathers would have wanted, I don’t care if Jesus was a hippie or not, I don’t care what Marx prescribed. I can’t take living in a world where we’re all servants of long-dead men. You know what happens if you make a law the Founding Fathers wouldn’t like? Nothing, they’re dead and they’re never coming back. I’m genuinely envious of countries that can just make whatever laws they want without worrying about how 18th century agrarian noblemen would have seen it. Stop arguing that Jesus loved the poor too, what he loved or didn’t love is irrelevant, he doesn’t get a say in any of this. We could have a country that isn’t shackled to these ghosts if we collectively wanted to.

wahbegan:

acciowine:

imthehuggernaut:

kurosmind:

catwithbenefits:

funfetti-cakke:

starfleetrambo:

magnolia-noire:

logynnrose:

weavemama:

MILLENNIALS ARE BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING IT’S GETTING SO OLD

The Black Death wasn’t transmitted by rats. It was transmitted by millennials.

millennials shot versace

millennials killed off the dinosaurs

Millennials shot Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria and Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg.

Cain was a millennial

Millennial caused the Great Permian Extinction

The Titanic didn’t hit an iceberg. It collided with floating colony of ocean millennials.

Millennials stabbed Caesar. 

10 Surprising Historical Genocides You May Not Realize Millennials Were Responsible For

thesememesofyours:

cantanopeshitthatwastaken:

It’s interesting how diseases rip through schools at incredible speeds despite being in an arguably modern, clean(ish) environment. I wonder if it has something to do with the whole “you need a doctor’s note to excuse your absence of even one day” combined with the average price of going to a doctor, the lack of education on things like “you’re still contagious even after the fever goes away”, and the overwhelming message of “if you don’t struggle through it, you’re a failure!”

I mean this is all interesting and all valid social problems but I think diseases rip through schools because kids (including college kids) are very gross and have little care for hygiene

pisslick:

pisslick:

pisslick:

my ex’s 13 year old sister invited me to thanksgiving dinner and y’all better bet I’m going

my dad: there is no way in hell you are going

me: if you think anything you say is going to keep me from my ex’s aunt’s apple pie you are severely mistaken

THE PLOT THICKENS

my ex isn’t even going to be there!!!! deadass they replaced him with me