cockyhorror:

candidlyautistic:

cosmicnightmareplanet:

yourphysicsiskarkatrocious:

aplpaca:

kinda funny when english teachers say stuff like “i can tell if you didnt read the book” or “i can tell when people bs their paper”

no you cant.  you can tell when people are bad at bs-ing their paper.  i didnt even read the sparknotes and i barely skimmed the wikipedia and you gave me an A.  you kneel before my throne unaware that it was born of lies

“YOU KNEEL BEFORE MY THRONE UNAWARE THAT IT WAS BORN OF LIES” IS ONE OF THE GREATEST SENTENCES I’VE EVER READ AND I CAN’T FUCKING BELIEVE IT’S ON A POST ABOUT BULLSHITTING ON ASSIGNMENTS.

listen I’m an english teacher now and I don’t think people understand how bad people are at bullshitting. multiple people per semester will submit the most flagrantly clueless papers I’ve ever seen. one student submitted an “essay” about the book that was literally just rephrasing the chapter titles over and over. another student was supposed to write an essay on local history and turned in a 3 page paper about how she won a cheerleading competition in high school bc she didn’t do any of the research. Both of these students then wrote me angrily because they got Ds. I derailed my class for a full week JUST to teach these people how to bullshit because I thought everyone on earth knew how to use sparknotes, skim stuff, and fake their way thru an essay. it turns out that 50% of the class literally did not know you can and should get summaries, essay topics, and relevant research info online, OR how to fuckin skim a chapter. It was called Bullshit Week and it was the most valuable lesson I taught. people contacted me about it after and said it was their favorite english unit ever. when english teachers say “i can tell if u didn’t read the book” it’s because we expect you to SEEM like you read the book since “reading the book” is like the sole point of the class. If you’re gonna try to con me I at least expect to be dazzled. dazzle is how I got my job.

Maybe if high school teachers actually called it research and taught you how to do it, instead of calling it bullshitting, the students would actually understand it.

Instead, like me, they flounder and fail because they think it is cheating, and get in over their heads because they’re doing way too much work that didn’t have to be done.

That shit is on the teachers for not teaching it right, not on any of the students.

Slightly different concept but one of the best pieces of advice I ever received about writing scientific papers was, from my lecturer himself: “never read the whole paper. skim it. find the important bits. don’t waste your time”